Thursday, December 18, 2008


Speaking of multi-syllabic words.... how about, Papahanaumokuakea! Only nine syllables. Just rolls right off your tongue, don't it?

(pronounced: pop-ah-ha-now-mow-koo-ah-kay-ah)

Sorta reminds you of Humuhumunukunukuapua'a, eh?

Or my first, I learned when I was about 7 years old in private school, antidisestablishmentarianism. A convenient 12 syllables.

Well, all you Peak Freakers out in Peak Freak land, today I've got a new one for you. I've coined a new term for your own personal entertainment pleasure and to help develop our AWARENESS about the reality of Peak Oil and the inescapable nuances of the oil business.


(pronounced: blah-goy-yeh-vich-ick)

Allow me to illustrate the use of this term in polite conversation. 

Example: Two Saudi Princes are riding the ski lift on the chair in front of us at Aspen and we overhear them remarking, in their unmistakably British accents, that, "The situation with Iraqi oil exports has simply become Blagojevichic." (which of course refers to the black market sale of oil from Iraq that mysteriously seems to defy efforts at accounting and control by a whole host of governments including the United States, Iraq, Saudi Arabia, Italy, France, the UK, Russia and others, along with some of the biggest, most sophisticated oil companies in the world, that somehow can't seem to keep track of all the oil being illegally sold right in front of everybody that is supposed to be watching). 

In other words, another way to understand the true meaning of Blagojevichic is that "I've got something that's golden. I'm not going to give it away without me getting something for it." Kinda a Dick Cheney sort of philosophy, no?

Why should anybody sell oil on the open market and have to pay taxes or properly account for it? Isn't it interesting how Iraqi oil production seems to be officially stuck at about 2.5 million barrels per day? Gee, I wonder where all the other 2 million barrels a day are going?

"Corruption charges! Corruption? 

"Corruption is government intrusion into market efficiencies in the form of regulation. That's Milton Friedman. He got a god damn Nobel prize. 

"We have laws against it precisely so we CAN get away with it.

"Corruption is our protection!

"Corruption keeps us safe, and warm.

"Corruption is why you and I are prancin' around in here instead of fighting over scraps of meat out in the streets.

"Corruption, is why we WIN!" (Danny Dalton- from the 2006 film Syriana)

So, there you have it. Blagojevichic. Corruption. Greed.

Admittedly, Blagojevichic might be a little long-winded for a public with the attention span of a pteropod and it doesn't enjoy the bi-syllabic efficiency of other popular terms like "Ponzi" but still, I propose that it is wonderfully functional as a shorthand for an otherwise impolite subject.

(p.s.- Papahanoumokuakea is the correct name for what is otherwise known to those outside of the Ocean Tribe as the Northwest Hawaiian Islands Marine Sanctuary, which of course is the absolutely amazing legacy that George Bush gifted to the world in 2006 and represents the single greatest effort by anybody, ever, to preserve "the environment" and remains the United States' new "Grand Canyon of the Pacific" even though the Average-Joe American over at Starbucks doesn't have a clue it exists or why it is so important.

And, a "Humuhumunukunukuapuaa" is otherwise known to mainlanders as the "Reef Triggerfish," which are actually quite tasty to eat, even though they are now protected and not politically correct to dine upon.

WARNING: Just be careful not to teach any small children in your life how to say Humuhumunukunukuapua'a or they will run around in circles driving you crazy repeating it over and over and over again. Enjoy!)

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